I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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