office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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