just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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