omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
