I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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