Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
