are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Just cropdusted the office
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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