O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
