She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
You took a bar mat shot.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
