God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
