And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
