craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
