If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize