Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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