I don't think brook has ever known best
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
