11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize