Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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