I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
