? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize
