Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize
