White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
