Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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