She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
