Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
