Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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