never play flip cup with pint glasses
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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