no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
