Cold hands, warm shart.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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