I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Randomize