walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize