scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
