i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize