I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
