i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
