i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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