found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
