I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
