Are we in a gay sports bar?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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