He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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