I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
