So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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