He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
