just tell him i said nine months
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
