I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
