I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
