Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
