I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
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