his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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