it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
