you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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