fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
